This coming weekend, we are going to finish our shade patio at the front of the farmhouse. Dad is bringing over a skid steer, and we’ll load in soil (and lengthen the space for the barn at the same time.) Then, we’ll mulch it all and plant ferns and bleeding hearts. 
It will be my mom’s garden, and it will be my way of remembering her as part of our wedding.
At the wedding, on that day of great joy, we will not have a tribute to her, except for something small and private I will carry with me of hers. I cannot tell you how much I miss her, how much I wish she could have known Philip, how much I ache for her to be there on that day.
But that day, we will put aside all those feelings as best we can and celebrate. I simply do not want to call forth grief on that precious, joyous day.
So please know that I remember my mom, that I want her with me so desperately, but please, don’t tell me you know she’d like to be there or say something pithy about how’s she’s watching. Just know that I miss her and spend some time in her garden out front, if you will.
And recommend shade-loving plants, too. We’ll have painted ferns – Mom’s favorites – and some hosta, too. I’d love other ideas, though. What do you recommend?
God's Whisper Farm 
Oh, that mixture of emotions … celebration and grief, hope for the future and acceptance of terrible loss. May your day will be filled with so much love that the saddness for your mom is comforted.
My favorite shade plants are begonias, the big tuberous ones, and fushias. They’re a burst of lush color amongst the ferns.
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May your day be blessed in every way imaginable; even though there will be a tear in the fabric, it’s a beautiful one. You enjoyed such a rich and warm relationship with your mom and that is a gift forever. I used to enjoy coral bells and primroses in a shade garden I used to have. But then, I live in CA and could enjoy their somewhat longer season here. Whatever you choose will be perfect, I’m sure.
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Ruth’s garden is a beautiful idea, and it will indeed be beautiful. It will bring a smile to your lips as well as your heart every time you look at it. Adding some pots of fall blooms in her garden that would make those dried flowers she loved would make a nice touch – this year pots – next year, seeds. In addition, something evergreen like a camillia would be good. Woody knows all the right plants to perhaps have something blooming most of the year. Also, ask him to build a lttle bench for the garden. This is a wonderful project for both of you. I look forward to enjoying this spot of quiet rembrance and reflection.
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[…] finishing up a big burn in the pasture, and Philip is cutting the last of the brush from the bank. Mom’s shade garden is almost finished, and Dad is putting the final steps in for the front […]
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